Once again, I came to that checkpoint in my day; the sacred “naptime” where every mom has a critical decision to make. 1-2 hours of uninterrupted time (if I’m lucky) and how to spend it? There is always part of me that just wants to stop, drop and snooze. Then the Susie Homemaker in me wants to make the house presentable (she never wins). The business woman side of me just wants to power through and get as much work as possible accomplished in that time. That one usually wins. After all, this business pays all our bills and allows us to help others along the way. However, today my heart said, “write”. I find it so difficult to let my heart win this one. Writing these days feels like a luxury as I sit amid piles of laundry and dirty dishes with a to-do list a mile long running through my mind. But alas, here I am. I’ve realized that when I silence that one passion, this outlet, this need to for self-expression I not only feel distant from the One who created me to write, but everything else in my world suffers as well. I become grouchy and irritable at the other duties I feel are pulling me from my heart’s desire. That, my friends, is an ugly place to live and everyone in my house notices it. You see, I could forge ahead, trudge on and strive to pave my path in this business while keeping all the other pieces of my life in place. Or I can stop, center myself, commit to this calling God has placed on my heart and allow Him to hold all the pieces as He weaves the path for me. All the striving and pushing forward won’t amount to anything if I forsake the very desires God placed in my heart. And whether I am good at it or not, He has placed a desire for writing in my heart. When God places a call upon your life, just forget about being equipped, competent or superior in any way. All He needs is for you to be obedient. So today, I choose obedience. I choose to trust in what I cannot see and believe that he will bless all the other pieces I laid aside in order to pick this one up. Above all, I choose Him.
Philippians 2:3